🔗 Share this article That Drifting Poo Was Far Too Meaningful! These Are the Television Disappointments of the Past Year. As we reflect on the television offerings of the past year, a selection of shows emerge not for their brilliance, but for their spectacular shortcomings. Ranging from cringe-inducing sequels to bafflingly poor docuseries, here are the programmes that left us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote. The 'Sex and the City' Sequel How to start with this divisive spin-off? Plagued with woeful writing, painful arcs (justice for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series fought to find its footing. For a moment, as the final season started, it looked like it had at last hit its stride. Then arrived an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the creator announced this would be the final series. It ended on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s loo flooded with poo was just way too on-the-nose. Yet, viewers undeniably had a hoot dissecting every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t release a little sob? All’s Fair ‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’ But that was almost the least of this drama's problems. The recipient of a very rare zero star review, it was hard to know where to begin enumerating the flaws. The hilariously wooden writing? The tedious veneration of affluence and consumption? The almost deliberate parade of cliches? Performances so poor they felt almost spiteful? Suffice it to say “each and every one” and never speak of this series again. However, a new season has been ordered, so we’re likely going to have to. AKA Charlie Sheen Given the legal troubles, domestic violence allegations and parental failures, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not that you’d truly have gleaned it from this three-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless hedonism while failing to tell us a single thing we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any pity this show might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to suffer close contact with this charming but dismissive narcissist. The Iris Affair Naturally we understood it was ridiculous from the outset: a thriller about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of sheer admiration for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat. MobLand Shady characters meeting in deserted boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back. In truth, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many seem a little dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the embarrassment of having to accommodate unconvincing accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Primarily that it was just profoundly boring; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various London picaresques which seemed rather simplistic. With Love, Meghan Given the extent to which she provokes the ire of the nation’s ostentatiously enraged commentators, it’s almost tempting to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into twee lifestyle as deliberate statements. But then you watch them and are compelled to concede that actually, they might have a point. It’s like watching a homeware catalogue come to life; a poster for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, sentimental platitudes and forgettable crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by vast, mostly undeserved wealth. Ugh. The Beckham Documentary There are obviously interesting things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her journey with vocation, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this documentary series chose not to explore them. Instead, the experience was like reading a sales catalogue. She clearly has good reason to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But sadly, she didn’t do herself any favours with this cagey non-event of a series. The Game Show It had the potential to be the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality overseeing her estate. What more could you want? As players battled it out, there was plenty of backstabbing and squabbling. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too confusing to detail what precisely was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up smelling of a production that was straining desperately to emulate something way beyond it. Too Much How do you follow a show that defined a generation? The pressure was enormous for this starry romcom about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The star took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Jane Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was not enough. Plus, the abundance of famous cameos involved felt uncomfortable. The Sketch Show Return Not even good enough to be ‘patchy’. Given the smart recruitment of talented emerging comics, expectations were high. But unhappily, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a dry pulp but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply provoked the thought that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer. The Knox Dramatisation This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The material needed to be treated sensitively. Rather, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right voice, lumbering from oddly jaunty, slightly mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A complete mess? Absolutely. Prime Target We admire the lead actor … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so intelligent he’s on the verge of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? Nope! This international thriller about government agencies targeting – and killing off – intellectuals frankly got more absurd by the second. Formulaic nonsense. The Bonnie Blue Documentary This uncritical portrait followed the online personality notorious for explicit exploits as she prepared for her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was way more interrogation of her actual psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the legendary mum who appeared to drag her son out of the queue. What we got was disturbing imagery and zero interrogation of her infamy whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.